The Guard: A Movie Review

Posted on Oct 10, 2011 in Uncategorized

This qualifies as a “I am tired and cranky and just want to go to bed but I committed to this stupid post-a-day challenge so now I must write something” post.  You’ve been warned.  I’m beginning to reevaluate the legitimacy of this challenge; since when is quantity better than quality?  But as of now it’s only day 10, so it’s far too early to give up.  Even if I am pregnant, which should serve as a valid excuse to do whatever I want within legal bounds.   Including throwing in the towel on a blogging challenge!  But I won’t.  Not today.

-Sigh-

Instead I’m going to go tell you to see The Guard.  It’s hilarious.  Even though I’m cranky, thinking about the film makes me smile a bit.

The Guard

First of all, I love Don Cheadle and he happens to be in this movie.  You should love him, too.  He’s very talented.  It’s a fact.

Second, it takes place in Ireland, so everyone but Don Cheadle has Irish accents.   (There are a couple of British accents thrown in as well.)  You can’t (or at least I couldn’t) understand half of the dialogue, but the accents somehow make everything more funny.

Third, Damon and I both thoroughly enjoyed the movie, which almost guarantees you will enjoy it.  It is a rare, rare occurrence when Damon and I are both entertained by a film. Your movie interests must fall somewhere between ours, so it follows that you will also be entertained.

Fourth, if you are like Damon and me and need a distraction from your alma mater’s recent dismal football performance, this movie will provide such a distraction.  Whereas a movie like, say, Contagion will leave you stressing about an inevitable pandemic that will likely kill you, thus only adding to the anxiety you already feel regarding a poor-performing college football team, The Guard will provide a happy escape.

OK, have I persuaded you to see it yet?  Even if your college football team is doing well, you could still use a laugh, right?  I promise it is money well spent.

And now i am going to bed, finally!

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News Flash: Nagging Your Husband is Good for His Health

Posted on Oct 9, 2011 in Uncategorized

I stumbled upon this little gem the other day: The Nagging Effect: Better Health for Married Men. The gist of it is, women are often caregivers and generally take better care of their health than their spouses, and thus encourage their husbands to take better care of themselves.  At least, that’s how I read it. I know this to be true.  A few years ago (before Damon and I were married, actually) I noticed a skin anomaly on his forehead along his hairline.  Being paranoid health-conscious, I nagged urged him to get it checked out.  It turned out to be basal cell carcinoma.  Easily removed and treated, thankfully.  All thanks to his loving and concerned significant other! Moral of the story: Ladies, feel free to nag your husbands.  Men, graciously accept such nagging.  It’s for your own good.  Your life could depend on it! But let’s not call it “nagging” – such an ugly word. Share...

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Adventures in Baking

Posted on Oct 8, 2011 in Uncategorized

I made these!  And they didn’t suck! OK, that’s a blatant lie; I didn’t make them.  I read the instructions aloud to my mother and she made them. If only all baking involved me just telling other people what to do – I’d do it a lot more often. However while instructing my mom on how to make the brownies, I had an epiphany: I’m much too much a perfectionist to be a good baker. As “we” were making the pumpkin batter, I told my mom to mix the pumpkin puree, vanilla, cinnamon and ginger to the mixture that “we” had already prepared.  “My cooking instructor says to always double the spices when cooking with pumpkin,” my mother informed me.  I watched in horror as she scooped in not the allotted 1/2 teaspoon of cinnamon and ginger each, but an entire FULL teaspoon of the spices. “Mom!” I gasped, “That is not what the recipe calls for!” “Diana,” she replied, casting me a who-do-you-think-I-am look, “Who has been baking for 40+ years?” Touché.  I decided to let this indiscretion go. But then there was the sifting incident.  At one point the recipe called for sifted flour.  To my dismay, my mom showed blatant disregard for this instruction.  “You don’t really need to sift,” she said, flicking spoonfuls of flour into the batter.  “This works just fine.” “Mom, I am not comfortable with this.  It specifically says to sift!  Why aren’t you sifting!?”  Sensing my panic, my mom obliged and sifted.  Although she could have also  sifted only because I had never sifted before and it is highly likely she felt compelled to demonstrate this baking technique lest she have another reason to feel she failed me as a mother.  Her grown daughter not knowing what sifting is?  The tragedy! That momentarily quelled my panic at my mom’s reckless approach to this recipe.  But as it came time to pour the batter into the pan, I noticed that there were some significant chunks of flour that had not been stirred in properly.  I pointed this out to my mother, who...

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Cutems!

Posted on Oct 7, 2011 in Uncategorized

I haven’t yet bombarded you all with the absolutely precious layette pieces I have acquired for Baby, but I’m super excited about a onesie I got in the mail yesterday that I just have to share! Sweet but with a bit of sass.  Just my style.  I mean, Baby’s style.  The onesie is from Mumsy Goose, an adorable boutique on Etsy that specializes in Baby and Toddler onesies and tees, as well as other baby gifts and accessories.  If you’re looking to outfit your kid or need a sweet baby gift, I’d definitely check out this shop.  The pieces are charming, creative and cute (but not sickeningly so).  And you can get personalization!  Which I totally would have done if I my husband and I could only figure out our kid’s name… Here are a few of my faves from their site (Click on the pic for info): Can’t wait till my little one is here so I can actually dress her in all this adorableness! Share...

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Irrationality of Blockbuster Proportions

Posted on Oct 6, 2011 in Uncategorized

My husband is a fighter pilot.  Sounds all sexy and cool, right?  Sure, until you’re pregnant and watch Independence Day.  Stay with me now. My gym has a fancy “Cardio Cinema” where you can pass tedious treadmill time (and it has become quite tedious now that I’m no longer able to actually run) by watching whatever the movie of the day is.  A couple of days ago it was the 1996 epic blockbuster, Independence Day (or, ID4).  Now who doesn’t love to watch Will Smith kick some alien ass?  Throw in Jeff Goldblum and Randy Quaid, and you’ve got yourself a winner. But let’s not forget the more tender moments of the film.  Between Will Smith’s BFF Harry Connick Jr. getting blown to smithereens by the evil aliens and President Bill Pullman’s wife dying after her helicopter crashes, Independence Day is a real tearjerker.  But watching ID4 in that gym, I went way beyond the bounds of normal movie-elicited emotion. When ID4 was released, I was 11.  El Toro was still a base.  (As a side note to all Southern Californians, remember when El Toro was closing?  The great debate?  What to do with the land – airport or park? Airport or park?  Well, aliens come and destroy the whole base anyway so turns out the debate was moot.) Anyway, having been released 15 years ago, I had forgotten much of the movie.  Specifically, that Will Smith is a fighter pilot.  In fact, I don’t think I really even understood what a fighter pilot was 15 years ago.  But now I’m married to one.  (Just FYI, Will Smith is a Marine, my husband is in the Navy.  But I digress). In the film, the U.S. launches an air attack on the alien mothership, and what happens?  THE EVIL ALIENS KILL ALL THE FIGHTER PILOTS. Cue panic attack. “Ohmygosh.  Ohmygosh.  That could be Damon.  When the aliens come he’s going to have to go fight them!  He can’t go fight the aliens!  He doesn’t stand a chance against their superior technology!  Noooooo.”  Seriously.  That went through my head.  So besides...

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Admit it: You Love Celine Dion Too

Posted on Oct 5, 2011 in Uncategorized

I’m only on day five of the WordPress post-a-day challenge, yet so far I have been very unimpressed with their post suggestions.  Recently they’ve been things like, “What do you think of the death penalty?” or “How would you reform the education system?”  Such topic matters do not belong on my blog; they belong at dinner parties. A much more appropriate subject for my blog? Celine Dion. Several weeks ago Rolling Stone released a poll of the 10 Worst Songs of the Nineties.  #7 was Celine Dion’s “My Heart Will Go On”. I’m sorry, did they get the list confused with the BEST songs of the nineties?! I was so distressed by Celine’s inclusion on this list that I haven’t been able to address it.  Until today. This morning as I turned on my car, my ears were greeted by the French-Canadian diva’s powerful (if a bit nasal-y) vocals. “Near, far, wherever you are…” Yesssssss.  I was instantly reminded how much I LOVE this song, and how undeserving its placement on this poll is.  The injustice! The Rolling Stone write-up states: “If you were a 13-year old girl in 1997 odds are very high this song made you cry your eyes out.”  True statement.  (Although I was 12, but close enough.) The article continues: “Now it probably just makes you cringe.” FALSE. As the music hit my ears, waves of emotions rolled over me.  I suddenly pictured Rose clutching Jack, “I’ll never let go, Jack.  I’ll never let go.”  I almost burst into tears on the spot. This illustrious song represented the height of my emotional maturity at 12-years old; It was the soundtrack to my tween years – and it’s all coming back to me now.  (See what I did there?  Another great Celine anthem.) How dare Rolling Stone discredit this glorious song?  How dare they suggest “My Heart Will Go On” is anything but a grand, majestic work of art that speaks to your innermost soul?  Whoever voted for Celine’s place on this list clearly has never let their dead lover sink into a freezing, dark ocean. ...

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